Like most people, confrontation is not something that I find easy. Most of us would rather avoid confrontation and, as the old saying goes, to be “lovers, not fighters”. Those who are skilled at confrontation often have a variety of approaches and words and know when and how to use the appropriate one. There are those who know when to confront and do so in a loving way as Paul describes in Eph 4:15. When confrontation is necessary, how should we go about it?


There are forces of evil at work in our world today as evidenced by ruthless killings of war, terrorist attacks, and gang-related violence and murders. In Psalm 55, we read of the violent and destructive forces of evil that David faced. After voicing his supplication to God about the wickedness and hatred of his enemies against him (v.v. 1-5), he says in v.6, ‘Oh that I had wings like a dove! For then would I fly away and be of rest.’ Escapism is a temptation – to shy away from confrontation. But evil must be confronted. We must do what we can (at least pray) and not run away or be overwhelmed. As Paul encourages us in Romans 12:21, ‘Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.’
There is a big difference between confrontation and condemnation. Jesus confronted people, but He did not condemn them. He did not come to condemn us but to save us from condemnation (John 3:17-18). Like Jesus, our message to unbelievers should not be one of condemnation, but rather the good news of salvation.


In Joshua 22:10-34, we read the account of a genuine misunderstanding between the rest of Israel and the two and a half tribes (the Reubenites, the Gadites, and the half-tribe of Manasseh) who thought they were doing the wrong thing in building an altar and disobeying God. However, war was averted because the Israelites were wise enough to confront them and challenge them verbally. When the two and a half tribes were confronted, they explained that they cared and wanted to ensure their children kept the faith: ‘In time to come your children might speak to our children saying, What have ye to do with the Lord God of Israel?’


As believers, we need to be careful not to jump to hasty adverse conclusions about other Christians and other churches. Many conflicts could be avoided if people would talk to each other, rather than just talk about each other.